The best that can be said of “Little Green Men” is that its concept is … quaint. In truth, there are a couple of enjoyable surprises and moments, but for the most part, the episode is a better as an idea than it is as a production. In fact, the story is one that has been told countless times in science fiction shows and one has to wonder why anyone thought that this version would be any sort of improvement. The result is an installment that can only be truly remarkable for die-hard fans of the series … and, at that, it’s a stretch.

Nog’s imminent departure for Starfleet Academy sets the stage for the story. There’s a neat scene in which he sells off his childhood belongings for money (a Ferengi tradition, it would seem) and the reminiscence Nog shares with Jake is suitably touching, if a tad bit sappy. After Quark offers to transport Nog and Rom to Earth (he has this new shuttle, see, and he wants to use it to smuggle stuff to Earth), they end up getting sent back in time to become the central figures in the Roswell, New Mexico incident in 1947. Considering the episode’s title and the fact that the three Ferengi were traveling to Earth, the revelation is as obvious as it is cliché.

The rest of the episode focuses on such developments as establishing communication (the Ferengi universal translators need to be fixed), Quark’s attempts to bamboozle the “primitive hyoo-mons” and the military’s inherent mistrust of anything unusual. Perhaps the best element of these scenes is just how much the 1940s humans smoke. I suppose it *may* have been a slight exaggeration, but if so, it’s not by much. And, if nothing else, it’s a decent commentary on how society has evolved since then.

But really, none of the Ferengi-based humor elements really work well. At best, the jokes are silly. At worst, they’re monumentally stupid. Add in the ridiculous self-referential humor about future “planetary alliances” and the whole thing ends up as a train wreck. And the episode goes a long way to portray itself as some kind of *really funny* farce.

Not so.

The only real commentary (aside from the incidental smoking) is the notion that military-types are all gun-ho to torture and kill while science-types are all naive dreamers — but also right. It’s just far too simplistic and myopic to provide any meaningful exploration of the ideas.

The episode’s best moment comes from its one and only surprise: Odo had stowed away on Quark’s ship and uses the form of a German Shepherd to explore the base, find Quark’s ship, and, finally, reveal himself to a thoroughly baffled Quark. Sadly, though, Odo is little used in the episode. And following his Big Reveal, he’s off again while Quark, Rom and Nog are tortured (sodium pentathol), and coerced (with a threat of being killed and carved up for research) — showing once again that military-types are all brutal bastards. It’s up to the scientists to help Nog disarm and knock out the MPs, allowing their final escape to the ship.

And, believe me, I think it’s important to convey sincere warnings against overly aggressive actions by anyone. But does this episode really have to portray the military so poorly?

And, yes, everything ends up as it should. Our trekkers return to their proper time. Nog enters Starfleet. Odo takes Quark into custody, and Rom — who displayed some wildly innovative technobabble — smiles at some time finally on his own.

“Little Green Men” makes some hay from the opening scene between Jake and Nog. The portrayal of Rom as an scientific whiz is a nice departure (development?) for his character. Odo’s turn is fun (if all too brief). But everything else is rubbish.

Filed under: Deep Space Nine